Chapter 12 – Are you impotent?

“Thanks,” Gu Lizhou waved his hand, declining their good intentions. “I can’t eat spicy food. If I do, I get small red rashes on my skin.”

“Then you’re quite sensitive,” Zhong Weishi said. “This is the first time I’ve heard of someone being allergic to spicy food.”

“Maybe it’s hormonal imbalance ah,” Da Fei said with concern. “A’Wei had a terrible acne breakout recently. When he went to see a traditional Chinese doctor, they said it was a hormonal issue. How’s your bowel movement? Are you constipated? Is it dry?”

Gu Li Zhou held his head, speechless.

He shouldn’t have lied about being unable to eat spicy food just to avoid the spicy snacks!

Da Fei ate the spicy strips slowly, and the conversation shifted from constipation to discussing what men should eat for kidney deficiency, with him and Zhong Weishi chatting enthusiastically.

Gu Lizhou didn’t really want to join their conversation, but it was no use at all.

“Are you impotent?”¹This literally translates to “Do you have kidney deficiency?”, but in this context, it’s commonly used as a euphemism for male sexual weakness or impotence, as the kidneys are believed to play a key role in reproductive health according to traditional Chinese medicine (TCM). The question came out of nowhere.

Da Fei’s curiosity stemmed from fear, as he’d heard that men tend to develop deficiencies as they age. Among them, only Gu Lizhou could be considered “a man of a certain age.”

Seeing the fragile neighborly relationship they had built with great difficulty about to break, Zhong Weishi quickly grabbed Da Fei’s sleeve. “What kind of question is that! Even if he had kidney issues, would he tell you!”

Gu Lizhou didn’t know how many times he recited in his heart: ‘We live in a society governed by law, killing is illegal,’ ‘Neighbors should get along peacefully,’ ‘Don’t argue with fools.’ Then he took a breath and smiled, “My kidneys are just fine, thanks for your concern ah.”

“You’re welcome.” Da Fei adjusted his wig and joined the group of dancing elderly women.

His slender figure, his back indistinguishable from the male or female, swayed gracefully. His thin waist danced more precisely than anyone else’s in the square, successfully attracting the attention of both single and married men.

Zhong Weishi recorded a short video of Da Fei and sent it in the group chat.

[Huangfu]: fvck, Da Fei’s got some serious moves with those hips ah!

[Weishi]: Honestly, with that figure, he’s no less than a woman.

[Wei-ge]: I’m starting to suspect there’s a little princess living inside him.

[Huangfu]: Too much of a goddess.

[Huangfu]: Da Fei, why don’t you just start wearing women’s clothes from now on?

Zhong Weishi stared at the screen, laughing uncontrollably, and gave a thumbs-up to Qiangzi’s “goddess.”

Da Fei, fully immersed in his role, gave him a flirtatious wink.

Zhong Weishi chuckled. “I suddenly realize Da Fei has a real talent for being a woman ah.”

The square was noisy, and Gu Lizhou couldn’t hear clearly, so he moved a little closer to Zhong Weishi. “What did you just say?”

Zhong Weishi turned to him and said loudly, “I said, do you want to go up there and dance for a while? It’s good for your body and mind!”

Gu Lizhou immediately refused the suggestion. “No, no, no, no, absolutely not. I don’t know how.”

“If you can’t, just learn ah. Look at Da Fei, he’s just moving randomly.” Zhong Weishi said.

“He has a natural talent for it,” Gu Lizhou said.

“Give it a try ah!” Zhong Weishi nudged his chin. “You might have talent too! With your long arms and legs, won’t it be a shame not to dance?”

Gu Lizhou was resolute. “No way, I’d rather die than go.”

After about half an hour, the sky gradually darkened.

Even though the warm breeze still blew through the square, the crowd had noticeably thinned, and some of the elderly participants started to leave one by one.

Gu Lizhou hadn’t really expected to find Er’Gou here; he was just there for the fun of it. After finishing his milk tea and cleaning up, he asked, “Do you guys want to head back?”

“No,” Zhong Weishi’s head was still bobbing to the rhythm of the music. “You’re leaving ah?”

“Ah, it’s getting dark. Er’Gou probably won’t show up. Let’s try again tomorrow,” Gu Lizhou said.

Zhong Weishi glanced at him. “Then you go first. I’m not leaving; I’ll wait.”

“What are you still waiting for ah?” Gu Lizhou sighed, scanning the area around the square. “The crowd’s almost gone.”

“It’s not completely gone yet. You never know,” Zhong Weishi said.

“Why are you always thinking ‘you never know’?” Gu Lizhou muttered to himself, then turned to him. “Don’t you feel like you’re wasting time?”

Zhong Weishi stopped bobbing his head. “Why are you suddenly saying that?”

Gu Lizhou licked his lips and voiced his concern. “There’s a chance Er’Gou won’t show up around Fenglin Community anymore. Isn’t it pointless for you to keep waiting here? Even if we found Er’Gou and his place, what if he’s already spent all the money? You guys wouldn’t get anything out of it. Why bother with all this effort?”

They obviously don’t have any brains, skill, money or support.

There was obviously the high probability of it being fruitless. Why were these people still willing to put in time and energy?

Gu Lizhou really couldn’t figure it out.

“How would you know if you don’t try?” Zhong Weishi braced both palms on either side of him and turned his head to look at him. “Everyone has a day when they reach the end of their life. So if we already know there’s an endpoint, why do people still strive to live?”

Gu Lizhou was silent.

“Because there’s light ahead,” Zhong Weishi smiled. “Where there’s light, there’s hope. If we assume ‘Er’Gou definitely won’t show up,’ then, of course, it loses its meaning. So we have to believe ‘Er’Gou will appear.’ Even if today’s attempt fails, what does it matter? There’s always tomorrow, the day after, and the day after that… Only by making a genuine effort can people see the direction clearly.”

Only by making a genuine effort can people see the direction clearly.

Zhong Weishi’s words felt like nails being hammered into Gu Lizhou’s heart, each word striking deep.

He, too, once had a direction to strive for and had seen hope before.

But fate had played a cruel trick, causing him to lose all his glory.

For the first time, Gu Lizhou questioned his past.

Was it fate?

Or had he given up hope first?

As another song ended, the square fell quiet for a few seconds before another familiar tune started playing. This time, it wasn’t a DJ version; the melody was much softer than the previous ones.

The crowd quickly scattered like grains of sand, as men and women paired up, each holding their partner’s hand until everyone formed a large circle.

This was going to be a duo dance.

Before Gu Lizhou could think clearly, Da Fei suddenly approached them.

“Everyone has a dance partner, and I feel so embarrassed being alone. Come dance with me!” Da Fei grabbed Zhong Weishi’s wrist.

“No, no, no!” Zhong Weishi clung desperately to the tree behind him, motioning toward Gu Lizhou. “Ask him to dance with you.”

Gu Lizhou waved his hand with a cold expression, so Da Fei didn’t dare to speak to him further.

“It’s fun ah, just try it with me.”

“No, I can’t, my limbs are uncoordinated.”

“I saw you doing flips earlier, and you seemed pretty coordinated ah,” Gu Lizhou said, gloating. “Weren’t you the one who just said to give it a try?”

“Roll! I’m withdrawing now!”

Da Fei, determined, wrapped his arm around Zhong Weishi’s and pulled him backward, baring his teeth.

Such a humiliating thing, of course, he had to drag someone down with him!

The two struggled like they were playing tug-of-war, neither willing to let go.

Several men watched Da Fei, secretly feeling pity. Such a feisty and attractive girl, and she already had a boyfriend.

Gu Lizhou circled behind the tree, gripping Zhong Weishi’s fingers, prying them open little by little with force.

Their strength was evenly matched, and Zhong Weishi’s fingernails turned pale as he shouted angrily, “Gu Lizhou, you fvcking let go of me!”

Gu Lizhou pulled a thorn off a nearby iron tree.

…

Zhong Weishi was yanked by the collar by Da Fei. He was dragged backwards all the way into the circle, and gave Gu Lizhou a middle finger.

Gu Lizhou laughed with his eyebrows bent, as he mouthed, “I’m watching you.”

“Say bye-bye to the gloom~ Let the beautiful rainbow stay~ Grab your hand, and dance wildly~ Sing out the brilliance of tomorrow~ La la la la~”

“Throw your worries to the Ninth Heaven²The highest of the heavens~ Let happiness and joy come your way~ Grab your hand, and dance to your heart’s content~ Dance out a bright future~ La la la la~~”

Zhong Weishi danced to the melody.

His dancing style was so clear and strange that he was particularly eye-catching in the crowd, while others were dancing in pairs while holding hands, he was just twisting rice-planting songs.

His movements were so clear and outlandish that he practically stood out in the crowd. While others held hands for a partner dance, he was doing a completely different style—his hips twisting to Yangge.³A popular rural folk dance.

His lack of coordination exceeded Gu Lizhou’s expectations. If he wasn’t stepping on his own feet, he was stepping on Da Fei’s.

The two kept bumping into each other in ways that defied explanation.

The final dramatic dip move ended with Da Fei being dropped to the ground.

Gu Lizhou couldn’t remember how many years it had been since he laughed so freely; he laughed so hard he couldn’t straighten up.

His fingers gripped his phone, shaking as he managed to record a clip and shared it with Cao Zhiheng.

[Useless Yet Awake]: Spot the highlight.

[Cao Zhiheng]: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha⁴I counted and it was 17 lol

[Cao Zhiheng]: Where are you at?

[Cao Zhiheng]: Who are these two idiots ah?

[Cao Zhiheng]: fvck, isn’t that 301? Hahahahahahahahaha, what is he doing, acting like he’s downed a kilo of shaojiu?⁵Name of a famous Tang dynasty whine, same as Baijiu

Gu Lizhou didn’t even want to waste a second replying. He held up his phone discreetly, suppressing his laughter until his belly ached.

As Zhong Weishi spun around, he happened to make eye contact with Gu Lizhou. He felt something odd about the way Gu Lizhou had his arms crossed, and then he noticed the phone tucked inside his elbow.

“Are you secretly filming me!” Zhong Weishi pointed at him. “Watch out, or I’ll sue you for violating my image rights!”

“No, how could that be.” Gu Lizhou smiled, not the slightest hint of guilt on his face.

“Then put your phone down.” Zhong Weishi was spun in place by Da Fei. “And don’t point the camera at me.”

Gu Lizhou boldly raised the phone directly at him. “With such graceful dance moves, I have to capture this for you…”

His voice suddenly cut off, and his fingers moved quickly across the screen.

He zoomed in.

Zhong Weishi, feeling embarrassed and ready to retreat, noticed the playful expression on Gu Lizhou’s face suddenly freeze.

An eyebrow was raised.

He signaled with a glance.

Zhong Weishi immediately picked up on it and turned to look behind him.

Not far away, a man crouched behind a flower bed, staring lecherously at a girl’s legs.