80% of Gu Lizhouâs social circle consisted of grown men, most of them over 30. Even if someone had a birthday and gathered everyone together, it was nothing more than drinking, eating, and singing a few songs. Forget giftsâeven a cake was a rarity.
Something like asking for a gift had never happened before.
The kid wants a gift.
What should he buy?
Clothes? Pants? Would that be too plain and boring? The clothes he gave last time hadnât even been worn.
A whole box of Weilong spicy strips?
Pfft.
Just the thought of it made him laugh.
Gu Lizhou couldnât come up with a good idea, so he called Cao Zhiheng. âFigured out what youâre getting for your father-in-law yet?â
âBuy red wine ah. Why? You got a better idea?â
âNo, just asking. Make sure you pick something with a bit of class. Donât end up buying a fake bottle and chugging it downâgetting drunk on counterfeit booze isnât a good look.â
Cao Zhiheng cursed at him. âYou bastard, canât you wish me well for once?â
Gu Lizhou laughed out loud âAi, did that little lunatic in 301 tell you tomorrowâs his birthday?â
âHe mentioned it, but Iâm not sure if Iâll be free tomorrow night. Why? He didnât invite you? Jealous that Iâm more well liked?â Cao Zhiheng said.
Gu Lizhou couldnât hold back a curse, laughing so hard his eyes nearly squinted shut. âHe asked me ages ago. He probably just mentioned it to you out of politeness. I mean, we live togetherâhe wouldnât want me telling you about it later and making it awkward for you.â
âCut the crap. Iâve known him for ages. Just recently, I even got him a role as the chief eunuch in a production. Heâs probably inviting me to thank me. You, on the other hand, are just the âbonus giftâ in a buy-one-get-one deal,â Cao Zhiheng boasted shamelessly.
Gu Lizhou laughed heartily but still insisted on arguing, âThen did he invite you to his birthday in the past few years?â
Cao Zhiheng had no idea whatâs up with him today that he had to compare this with him, but he genuinely felt that his relationship with Zhong Weishi had taken a qualitative leap forward thanks to that chief eunuch role.
âWe werenât that close the past four years. We just got familiar this year. You know, brotherhood like ours takes time to cultivate.â
âHave some shame.â Gu Lizhou pulled the conversation back on track. âSo what are you planning to give him?â
âGive him what? Just send a WeChat red envelope to show some goodwill.â Cao Zhiheng responded without hesitation.
Gu Lizhou was momentarily stunned. âHe didnât ask you for a gift?â
âA gift? What gift? A red envelope is practicalâwhatâs wrong with that?â Cao Zhiheng said. âBesides, who the hell would go around actively asking for gifts ah!â
Gu Lizhou: ââŠitâs that good brother of yours, ah.â
Human psychology was truly strange. He was clearly being chased for a gift, yet realizing he was singled out as someone special somehow put him in a good mood.
Even after hanging up the call, the smile on his lips refused to fade.
He clicked on a certain treasure1Taobao. Whereas æćź meant certain âćźâ or bao which can also mean treasure. website and had just typed in âgift for guysâ when an automatic suggestion popped up.
âGifts for Boyfriend
As if possessed, he clicked on it.
Watches, gaming consoles, razors, engraved lighters, couple T-shirts, custom ceramic mugs⊠The average price was under 150.
Almost every productâs main image had captions like âA gift no boyfriend can resist!â âGuys will tear up instantly!â âGive this, and heâll love you even more!â and so on.
The visuals were overwhelming, but internally, he felt nothingâif anything, he wanted to laugh.
He flipped through several pages, but everything felt like the kind of gifts only seventeen or eighteen-year-old kids in their awkward, innocent phase would give.
The second time, he changed the keywords: gifts for grown men.
Surprisingly, it was the same stuffâŠ
He must be searching the wrong way.
Alright, letâs try again.
The third timeâs keyword: gifts for little kids
âŠfvck. How the fvck is it still those!
Itâs not working!
Gu Lizhou nearly flipped his laptop over in frustration.
Switching to a certain hu 2This is another website: Zhihu.for answers, the suggested gifts had a bit more class.
Noise-canceling headphones, menâs perfume, notebooks, handcrafted leather wallets, mechanical keyboards, sneakers, speakersâŠ
But none of them gave him that immediate âAh, that little bastard would like thisâ feeling.
Gu Lizhou kept refreshing the page, feeling like an old father painstakingly researching university majors and future career paths for his kid.
Iâm so exhausted, Iâm going bald.
It was even more brain-consuming than codewords.
Was this how Zhong Weishi felt when he helped him find a job back then?
Gu Lizhou clicked into Zhong Weishiâs WeChat Moments, hoping to find some clues. Instead, he scrolled through a bunch of short videos.
Most were clips from the setâZhong Weishi jumping off a shipping container, landing face-first in the dirt, then getting up and grinning stupidly at the camera.
Qiangzi performed his signature trick of swallowing a whole dragon fruit in one go. The deep red juice dribbled down his neck as he spoke, âXin-jieâs fruit storeâimported straight from Hainan! Sweet and juicy, guaranteed! Order a box now and get two extra for free! Local customers from Yucheng can have it delivered at their door!â
Another video featured him devouring a watermelon. He stood in a solid horse stance, holding the melon with both hands. At the sound of a whistle, he jerked his head forwardâand in an instant, the watermelon flesh was gone. Meanwhile, the person next to him was still struggling to take their first few bites.
Qiangzi wiped his mouth dramatically in front of the camera, wearing the calm, confident smile of a true champion.
Gu Lizhou watched the videos with a twisted expression, his stomach aching slightly. What kind of hardcore survival skills were theseâŠ
Just as he clicked on the next video, Zhong Weishiâs frantic screaming blasted from the speakers, startling Gu Lizhou so much that he hurried to lower the volume.
âAH AH AH AH AH AHAHâGU-ZI GU-ZI GU-ZI GU-ZI GU-ZI! SIGN THIS FOR ME AHâIâIâIâIâM YOUR FAN!ââ3Apologies for the upper cases on this one if it hurts your eyes lol. Since he was screaming, I figured Iâd use this here. Thanks!
It looked like the back hallway of a high-end hotel. The shaky, nausea-inducing camera work barely captured a glimpse of a handsome celebrityâs smiling face.
The Superstar Gu himself patiently took the pen and doodled a spiral potato skewer on Zhong Weishiâs shirt.
âGu-zi, you radiate righteousnessâeven when you play villains, you look like an undercover agent! Iâve seen all your movies, super handsome!â You have to take good care of yourself ah!â Zhong Weishiâs voice trembled with excitement. At the end, he even added in Cantonese, âI I really like this one ah.â
Superstar Gu gave him a slight nod, flashing a dazzling yet impeccably polite smile before leaving.
Gu Lizhou: ââŠâ
Did this guy even know what he was saying?
And⊠just how many people did he like?
The video was replayed twice.
Pursing his lips, Gu Lizhou exited WeChat. With that enthusiasm, that tremble in his voice, that sheer joy spilling through the screenâGu Tianle was definitely his white moonlight!
Once that inexplicable sour feeling faded, a sudden flash of inspiration struck Gu Lizhouâautograph!
Right, right, right, autograph, autograph!
Wan Lizhouâs autograph!!!
It felt like he had just cracked a complex Olympiad math problemâhis was instantly energized
With a swift motion, he dashed out the door.
At noon, the scorching sun blazed overhead, even making the taxi driver look drowsy from the heat.
Gu Lizhou paid the fare, got out of the car, and hurried into a large bookstore.
Luckily, even after all these years, Wan Lizhouâs books still occupied a prime spot in the bestsellers section.
The <Wraiths> a complete set of twelve volumesâjust lifting them was a workout. Would this be too⊠hefty as a gift?
Gu Lizhou imagined Zhong Weishi, full from a meal, carrying this stack of books home like he was hauling a bundle of explosives. He couldnât help but laugh.
There are too many.
Better to pick just one.
The autograph was secondaryâthe real goal was to bestow upon him the prestigious title of âpersonal acquaintance of the renowned bestselling author Wan Lizhou.â
Gu Lizhou had already started picturing hundreds of possible reactions from Zhong Weishi when he found out his true identity.
Maybe heâd want a hug, soak in his brillianceâŠ
Will he scream at that time?
Definitely.
Then, blushing furiously, heâd cover his face, recalling the heartfelt confession he had once read aloud at nightâprobably embarrassed to the point of collapse.
Prepare to tremble, foolish Earthling.
Gu Lizhou, still lost in his fantasy of Zhong Weishi being moved to tears, grinned at the book coverâs wraparound band for a good whileâuntil someone tapped him on the shoulder.
It was a young girl. She pointed to her throat and ears, then shook her hand before gesturing at the donation slip in her other hand.
On it was a fundraiser for a childrenâs welfare organization.
Gu Lizhou gave her all the cash in his wallet.
A simple red string bracelet could be exchanged for a twenty-yuan donation, but he had given several hundred all at once. The girl looked overwhelmed. She only had two bracelets left in her pocketâmost of the remaining items were little bells.
The temperament of the man in front of her didnât seem like someone who would wear bells.
She quickly pulled out a prepared notebook, writing: âThank you for your kind donation. Wearing this will bring you good luck.â
âIs it blessed?â Gu Lizhou teased, twirling the red string between his fingers.
The girl squinted and smiled, nodding. She flipped to the next page and wrote: âWishing you and your lover good health.â
âI donât have a lover yet,â Gu Lizhou chuckled. âBut thanks anyway.â
The girl lowered her head and wrote quickly, âIt will help you find one!â
Even though he knew it was just a little trick to coax kids, he still accepted it with a smile.
At the checkout counter, he picked out a gold-embossed signature pen. After paying, he headed straight to the café next door.
What would be a good thing to write?
Gu Lizhou solemnly made a draft on his cell phone memo.
âTo Xiao WeiweiâŠâ No, no, no, way too mushy.
âTo Zhong WeishiâŠâ Does that sound too distant?
âTo little bastard,â that worked.
After signing, Gu Lizhou blew lightly on the page for a long time, letting the ink dry.
But still, considering that he was Zhong Weishiâs ultimate white moonlight in the 2D world, just giving him a novel worth a few dozen yuan felt a little stingy.
So, he headed to a nearby shopping mall and picked out a mechanical watch. It had a sleek black dial, a leather strap, and a simple, versatile design.
From the moment he stepped in, the sales associate had been chattering non-stop. âThis one looks really good on you, suits you perfectlyâvery classy and sophisticated.â
âItâs not for me, itâs a gift.â
âA gift still needs to be sophisticated ah.â
ââŠâ
âThis model is currently 20% off, and youâll get a complimentary gift worth 199 yuan.â
âJust wrap it up nicely.â
âNo problem, no problem! Would you like the gift to be wrapped separately?â
Just then, his phone rangâit was Cheng Hang. Gu Lizhou absentmindedly replied, âNo need, just put everything together.â
âWhen will you be back?â
âIn a couple days, I still have some things to do here.â
âAlright, no rush. The planning department is still recruiting new people. When youâre back, call meâIâll take you to our companyâs operations department so you can get a feel for the gameâs concept and design requirements. Then you can decide if you want to write for it.â
âGood.â
The calm surface of the lake rippled.
Gu Lizhou lost sleep again that night.
His emotions were complicated, his mind a tangled mess of thoughts.
About the past, the present, the future. About dreamsâŠ
He thought about what he really loved.
He used to think that if he ever stopped writing, he would probably die. But he didnât. Life went on.
Thatâs probably what life is all about.
Finding joy in monotony, creating something extraordinary out of the ordinary.
The next day was another hot sunny day.
Gu Lizhou slept until past three in the afternoon.
His head was groggy from the lack of sleep. After getting up and washing up, he caught sight of the small gift box on the table, finally remembering Zhong Weishiâs birthday.
While shaving, he mentally ran through the entire big reveal and gift-giving sequence.
First, he would hand over the novel and casually mention that it had Wan Lizhouâs personal autograph. When Zhong Weishi opened the cover and saw that one-of-a-kind, exclusive signatureâthe ultimate badge of honorâhe would definitely go nuts, jumping around so wildly his head might explode from excitement.
Then, after confirming his identity with tears of joy, they would share a heartfelt embrace.
Maybe Zhong Weishi would blush, stammering as he showered him with rainbow farts. But as a calm and composed author, he had to stay steadyâno laughing.
With a dignified wave of his hand, he would say, âGenius or not, Iâm just an ordinary person. But from now on, live well ah! Never stop chasing your dreams! As long as you work hard, fate will be beneath your feet. Trust me!â
Zhong Weishi would be so overwhelmed heâd tremble all over. âYouâll always be my idolâŠâ
Thatâs when he would present the watch as a souvenir for his fan.
Even the most ordinary gift would take on extraordinary meaning because of who it came from.
âWell? Isnât it thrilling, seamless, and unforgettable?â
Cao Zhiheng scratched his cheeks, genuinely moved by the elaborate plan. âMan, thatâs really thoughtful. If it were me, I wouldâve been moved to tears! No matter what you give at a time like this, youâll be moved to death!â
âRight? I thought so too.â Gu Lizhou was full of confidence.
Just then, his phone rang.
He had barely said âHelloâ when Zhong Weishiâs panicked voice exploded through the receiver. âCome, quickly save me ahââ
Gu Lizhou was so scared that his liver trembled, âWhat happened?! Where are you?â
âIâIâŠâ Zhong Weishi sounded pitiful. âI got taken to the police station.â
Gu Lizhouâs eyes widened. âHow the hell did you end up there again?!â
âTwo hours earlier.
After wrapping up ErâGouâs case, Huangfu Qiang got lucky and landed a new jobâan extramarital affair investigation.
A rich woman suspected her husband was keeping a mistress. If they could capture solid evidence, she could strip the man of everything in the divorce. The reward was a hefty 100,000 yuan.
Naturally, an opportunity like this had to be shared with his brothers in arms.
So the Xicheng Districtâs Express Debt Collection Team group was active again.
âBrothers brothers, the opportunity to get rich has arrived ah!â
Zhong Weishi was firm. âIâm not going, Iâm not going. Iâve decided to live an honest life. Donât drag me into any more get-rich-quick schemes.â
âNo, bro, this time itâs differentâlove triangles, scandals⊠Damn ya, this rich lady is loaded. She directly dumped me a 10,000 yuan deposit.â
Zhong Weishiâs eyes flickered. âThat much?â
Qiangzi held down the voice recording button and spitefully recounted the entire story in the group chat.
It was a continuous stream of ten or so 59-second voice messages, leaving everyone speechless.
âThat rich woman said she saw the chat recordsâheâs been flirting with some woman constantly. Itâs absolutely true. The only thing missing are pictures for evidence.â
After their previous overnight trip to the police station, Zhong Weishi remained rational this time. âThe key is, how do we get a photo? Are you planning to storm into his house? Have you lost your mind? Did you forget what Old Li told us?â
âThis time, weâre doing a good deed! Itâs an affair! Breaking up a couple is breaking up a couple,â Qiangzi spent nearly half an hour analyzing his views on marriage and love from every possible angle. âIn short, I think, from a moral standpoint, we have to help her.â
AâWei: âCheating? What kind of man is he? We have to kill him!â
Da Fei: âI agree.â
Zhong Weishi got straight to the point. âHow much is she paying you?â
Qiangzi sent a string of numbers.
Zhong Weishiâs eyes widened so much that he felt like he didnât need to use his hand to keep his eyeballs, they were about to pop to the ground.
After a long silence, the man who had just been chanting, âIâm not going, donât drag me into any get-rich-quick schemes,â suddenly spoke in a deep voice: âThat dog manâs behavior is outrageous. If I donât get photographic evidence, Iâll spell my name backward!â
Qiangzi and AâWei took turns following the dog man for several days before finally catching him wrapping his arm around a young woman and entering a high-end hotel.
Zhong Weishi, having watched too many TVB dramas,4*TVB drama produced by Television Broadcasts Limited (TVB), a Hong Kong-based television broadcasting company. teamed up with AâWei to steal a hotel staff uniform and service cart before heading over to knock on the door.
When they entered under the guise of delivering desserts, the woman was already lying on the bed in a bathrobe.
Wealth is obtained from taking risks!
The opportunity was right in front of them!
The difference between TV dramas and reality was that, in dramas, the protagonist could stealthily place a hidden camera in a spot unnoticed by the villain. In reality, however, shaky hands led to immediate suspicion.
The moment the girl called out to him, Zhong Weishi trembled in fright, and the camera fell straight to the floor.
All in all it was quite a grueling battle.
It was so close to dying on the spot.
Now, clutching his swollen cheek from the slap heâd received, Zhong Weishi skipped over the brutal beating he had endured and barely held back tears as he explained, âOld LiâOld Li said that since he knows me, heâs going to keep me locked up a few extra days.â
Gu Lizhou really didnât hold back and laughed so hard that his shoulders shook. âHahahahahahahahaââ
âYouâre laughing?!â Zhong Weishi roared. âAre you even my bro!â
Gu Lizhou made no effort to stop. âWell, guess youâll be staying a few more days. Who told you to go around causing trouble?â
âIâI, I really know I was wrong. I still want to film⊠But they said I have to pay a fine before theyâll let me out.â
Realizing that his record might soon be marked with an unforgettable stain, Zhong Weishi grew anxious, his eyes reddening. His voice softened, âI donât know who else to call. Just help me out this once, for the sake of our brotherhood. Come pay the fine for meâIâll write you an IOU as soon as I get out. I swear Iâll pay you back!â
Money wasnât an issue, but Gu Lizhou raised an eyebrow and asked, âWhatâs in it for me?â
âWhat do you want? Whatever I can give, Iâll give you.â Zhong Weishi pouted. âIâll even wash your underwear if I have to. Please, just get over here. Qiangzi and the others were all picked up by their parentsâonly Iâm left. The police uncles are about to get off work.â
It was a completely normal plea, but when it reached that old beastâs ears, for some reason, he couldnât help but picture a little kid crouching at a kindergarten entrance, drawing circles on the ground.
âAll the other kids were picked up by their parents⊠Iâm the only one left.â
Gu Lizhou was amused by his own imagination and reassured him, âNo rush, there are still officers on duty anyway.â
His voice carried a relaxed tone, his brows slightly raised in amusement. Transmitted through the wireless call, his words sounded more like he was gloating.
âIf you donât want to come, forget it. Iâm hanging up.â Zhong Weishi let out a heavy snort.
âDonât hang up.â
âWhat?â Zhong Weishiâs tone was icy, but deep down, he was smugâhe knew Gu Lizhou wouldnât have the heart to leave him stranded.
Gu Lizhou curled the corner of his lips. âCall me Daddy.â
âHuh?â Zhong Weishi was stunned.
Holding a cigarette between his fingers, Gu Lizhou grinned wickedly. âCall me Daddy, and Iâll come get you right now.â