The full text is 110k words. Just only 1RMB to get the complete subscription badge~

A self-fed book qwq. There were really no online-game novels left to read, so I had no choice but to write one myself. This one feels a bit immature orz Later, I started another online-game novel, there’s a lot more improvement in that one! You can find it in the author’s column at the top right.

#Let’s dig into that He Gui, who can be male or female, a top or bottom#

#(//ω//) Want to marry He Gui Gui#

#Da1Big, great He’s Scumbag-Slaying Guide#

#A Walking voice changer#

#He·Women’s Best Friend·Gui#

#Requesting The Scumbag’s Psychological Trauma Area#

#Want To See Da He In Women’s Clothes#

Yu He stared at those tags and fell silent. Even the kitten he was petting on his lap instantly lost its appeal.

All of this started from the day he accidentally opened the fan group.

As a semi-retired big shot in the online voice-acting circle, Yu He usually just posted on Weibo to show off his cat, and every now and then popped up in the fan group to chat and mess around.

Life in semi-retirement was very leisurely. College was already halfway over, his family was loaded, and his future was bright. The only problem was that he was so idle he was about to grow feathers.

Just as Yu He was considering taking on a radio drama to kill some time, he happened to see a girl pouring her heart out in the fan group.

She was scammed by her online-game boyfriend. Not only did he scam her money and feelings, but he also took advantage of her body. Later, she found out he was a serial player, a full-on sea king2Player who plays around with girls. who preyed on girls everywhere, always skirting the edge of legality and exploiting loopholes in the law, leaving people completely powerless against him.

The group was full of indignation, yet helpless.

It was a small group called “Shou He’s Old Gongs,” with fewer than a hundred people. Those were all fans who had supported He Gui since he was still a nobody. He recognized most of the usernames inside.

This girl was good at drawing and had even made fanart for him. Whenever a drama came out, she was always one of the first to support him. The two had added each other on □□3Censored text. long ago.

Looking at the chat logs made Yu He feel a pang of unease as well. After thinking for a few seconds, he clicked on her profile picture and sent a few words of comfort.

She was a die-hard fan, so receiving comfort from her idol made her quite excited, and she continued venting in private messages.

As she vented, the topic suddenly began drifting in a strange direction.

Girl: Lately, there have been a lot of annoying things. I also have a friend who got tricked by a voice changer in another game. It grossed her out so much she quit the game, and she still hasn’t recovered.

He Gui: A voice changer?

As everyone knew, He Gui was famous for his wide vocal range and ever-changing voice. He had once voiced an entire radio drama alone, playing multiple roles by himself, earning the nickname “walking voice changer.”

Whether male or female voices, he could handle them all with ease, his fake voices exceptionally convincing and often stunning everyone.

Girl: Yes, a voice changer

Girl: !

He Gui: ?

Girl: Do you play PUBG?

He Gui: A little.

Girl: Are you interested… in crushing some scumbags?

He Gui: _(:з」∠)_ I think it might be worth a try?

Since the law couldn’t punish the scumbag, they would return the favor in kind and disgust him right back.

Girl: This is that scumbag’s PUBG account…

Girl: He especially likes girls with sweet, coquettish voices.

He Gui: Consider it done!

Girl: 🙂 Sigh, that asshole still owes me 2,000 yuan.

He Gui: Let him properly experience society’s harsh lessons and the ugliness of human nature.

He Gui: Don’t beat yourself up too much. Try to stay positive. You can always come talk to me anytime _(:з」∠)_

Girl: It’s fine, really. It’s already 2020 now. I’ll just treat it like getting bitten by a dog~ I loved once!

Girl: I’ve really troubled you, Da He qwq

He Gui: Mm-hm [pats head] You have to pull yourself together quickly.

Girl: If you could grant me one more little wish… I’d recover even faster.

He Gui: What wish?

Girl: o(*////▽////*)q I want to hear your moans.

He Gui: ?

The girl was definitely hurting inside, yet she forced a smile in front of him, putting on a brave front. Yu He couldn’t help feeling sorry for her.

All he could do was do his best to help her get revenge on that scumbag.

Of course, moans were absolutely out of the question.

Although he had voiced both BG and BL radio dramas, they were always clean and restrained. Fake voices were his specialty, but moans were firmly in his knowledge blind spot.

Yu He felt a bit excited about returning to his old trade.

This time, it wasn’t fake-voice acting for a drama, but real combat scumbag-slaying that was much more challenging.

Under Yu He’s relentless barrage of “good brother”, the scumbag fell for it smoothly. After proposing to meet up, Yu He gave a fake location. While the scumbag was standing at the airport, battered by the freezing wind, a greasy voice message was sent over without mercy—

“Actually, I’m a guy.”

Immediately after came the full combo: block and delete in one smooth motion. That man would probably never forget how he’d been toyed with by a “rough guy” for the rest of his life.

Later, with Yu He’s consent, the girl edited and posted some chat records and audio clips online after censoring sensitive information. She removed anything involving privacy and added reminders about being cautious with online relationships, which resonated strongly with the public.

From then on, people would come to Yu He every so often, asking him to help take down scumbags. But these matters were hard to judge and involved other people’s private affairs; it wouldn’t be appropriate for him to keep interfering, so he stopped accepting such requests.

Still, that one incident had pushed him into sudden fame beyond his usual circle.

Fortunately, he had always been creating purely out of passion, and very few people in real life knew about his CV4Character Voice identity. Otherwise, he really would’ve been worried about that scumbag seeking revenge.

Then again, the guy was the type who bullied the weak and feared the strong, so he probably didn’t have the guts.

Yu He sighed and casually scrolled through Weibo. The screen was filled with philosophical symbols and aoaojiao,5Copied it as is in the raw. This means gibberish talks. making him laugh and sigh at the same time. As he kept scrolling, a video call suddenly came in; it was from his cousin, Yu Guo.

“What’s up?” Yu He curled his lips slightly when he saw the puffed-up, sulky bun-face on the screen.

His cousin was two years younger than him, a freshman in college. They’d been close since childhood, and she was always informal around him. Whenever she got into trouble, it was usually him who had to clean it up.

“I ran into a sea king through an online game relationship…” Yu Guo said while gnawing on an apple, chewing hard.

Now, whenever Yu He heard words like “game,” “online relationship,” and “sea king,” he felt the vein on his forehead twitching.

How did this girl end up in an online relationship, too??

“I’ve been single since birth. How did I end up running into something like this…” Yu Guo’s eyes grew red as she spoke.

This time, Yu He didn’t know what to do.

She was usually fearless. Forget crying, she wouldn’t even frown after falling flat on her face. And now because of an online relationship…?

After what happened with the previous girl, he couldn’t help but imagine the worst.

Yu Guo sniffed, glaring as she forced the tears back.

“What exactly happened? Take it slow,” Yu He said gently, coaxing her.

If it was what he feared… he’d fly over and break that scumbag’s legs himself.

“Well, I’ve been playing Xianxia Online recently. I didn’t feel like leveling, so I hired a booster,” Yu Guo said, calming down a little after sniffing again.

“Mm.” He knew Xianxia Online, a hugely popular MMO lately, with gorgeous visuals and innovative gameplay that had attracted a massive fanbase.

Yu Guo had recommended it to him countless times already. He’d wanted to try it too, but for various random reasons, he’d never actually gotten into it.

“That scumbag was the booster I hired. I originally wanted him to level me to max. Then a new gear came out that you could only get through a romance quest, so I paid extra and asked him to do that for me. I paid him through WeChat, and he formed a lover bond with me in-game.”

“He’s pretty impressive. The leader of the top guild, and his voice even sounds good. Damn.”

“After helping me get the gear, he even helped me get a lot of other good stuff and didn’t ask for any payment. I basically freeloaded, and everything was all vague and ambiguous.”

“When people in the guild teased us about our relationship, he didn’t deny it. He even protected me. I really thought I’d lucked into some Mary Sue storyline…”

“Turns out he’s a total sea king. He divorced me without a word, then immediately turned around and went to run dungeons with another girl.”

“I really should’ve gone to the forum first to read the gossip. There are tons of posts about him. I was seriously blind.”

The more Yu Guo talked, the angrier she got. “People like that are going to get what’s coming to them sooner or later.”

It wasn’t like she’d fallen deeply in love; she’d just been treated with that kind of ambiguous care. What girl could resist that? Only to realize it was all her own wishful thinking. Of course, she felt both hurt and furious.

She rattled on for a long while, and Yu He didn’t interrupt. He just listened quietly and attentively.

“Have you two ever met in real life?” Yu He asked.

“No.” Yu Guo shook her head.

Yu He finally let out a breath. At least she’d only been deceived emotionally.

“Which server are you on? What’s that scumbag’s name?” Yu He asked, carrying the cat back to the bedroom and opening his laptop.

“Huh?” Yu Guo froze for a second, then suddenly realized something. “Bro… are you coming out of retirement again??”

As one of the few people who knew about Yu He’s CV persona, she was aware of that fake-voice scumbag-slaying incident. She’d only wanted to vent a bit. She hadn’t expected this…

_(:з」∠)_ Why did that suddenly feel kind of exciting?

Yu He gave a soft “Mm,” opened the Xianxia Online official site, and started downloading the game. He’d wanted to try it for a long time anyway. Why wait for a better day?

“In Dianwu6Literal Translation: Electric 5: Chang Xiang Si.7Lit. Longing, Everlong The scumbag’s name is Tang Chao.”

“I’ll take you with me, ah. I’m still in the same guild as that scumbag. The other people in the guild are actually pretty nice. I’ll go find the vice leader to pull you in. He’s a really good guy…”

“Gotta go, gotta go log in to run quests. Why bother with men when I can just play games?”

Yu He couldn’t help laughing. This girl’s loud, lively personality was actually pretty great. She had strong recovery skills. Crying one second, laughing the next.

But… being good at self-healing didn’t mean being screwed over by a scumbag could just be brushed aside. As her older brother, Yu He was definitely the type to hold a grudge.

The installation package was huge and wouldn’t finish downloading anytime soon, so Yu He went to browse the Xianxia Online forums. In the Chang Xiang Si server section, there was no shortage of posts about that person.

— Scumbag Tang Chao is out preying on girls again and again. Hooking up with a new girl every day? Seriously 8niu bi = impressive

— Luo Yan quit the guild? Things fell apart with Tang Chao??

— 818,9lit. Dig a little/expose/spill the tea Boss Tang and his fish pond

— Confused. Luo Yan just got married, and Boss Tang set off 99 fireworks for Guji at the Sansheng Stone??

…

This scumbag really had quite a long list of dark history.

Only a silly girl with a big-hearted, careless personality would’ve fallen for him.

By the time the game finished downloading, it was already 11 pm. Yu He thought for a moment, then went and bought an account. In games like this, max level was just the starting line anyway, and he couldn’t be bothered to spend time grinding.

Like other xianxia MMOs, Xianxia Online divided its classes into healer, assassin, tank, and mage.

Healers were from the demon race and could choose spiritual forms—rabbits, cats, foxes, and the like. They were cute in appearance and very popular with girls. Assassins were high-burst but fragile, requiring extremely high mechanical skill and game awareness. Tanks were Shaolin—tanky as hell, bad at pretty much everything else, champions at taking hits. Mages were Qin players, long-range specialists who could deal damage and apply crowd control.

The account he bought was a loli healer with rabbit ears. The character’s face had been customized so beautifully that Yu He picked her at first glance. Her cultivation level and skill points were solid, and with several sets of purple gear, she was overall a pretty good account.

After buying the account, Yu He launched the game and went to send Yu Guo a message.

Daming Lake’s Xia Yuhe: I bought a healer

Guoguo: What’s the name, what’s the name? I’ll add you

Daming Lake’s Xia Yuhe: Jiaojiao

Guoguo: ?

Translator’s note: Hi!! New novel :blobhighfive:

Hope you like it! :blobsmilehappyeyes: