Chapter 5 – How can I bear to blame the beauties for making mistakes?
Xiao Shiqing and Empress Dowager Wen were busy managing the affairs of the Great Jing dynasty, while Zhao Qi continued to stay in his sleeping quarters doing nothing. Unfortunately, even a slacker had their own troubles.
Zhao Qi spat out a gr4p3 seed with a “puh” sound and said, “What did you say? Say it again?”
Jiang Dehai trembled as he spoke, “The Imperial Hospital just reported that… that Miss Wang has been pregnant for two months.”
Zhao Qi frowned, “Who is Miss Wang?”
Jiang Dehai replied, “Miss Wang is the famous courtesan from Huainan that Your Majesty brought back to the palace during your trip to the south.”
Zhao Qi: “So you’re saying I’ve been cuckolded?”
Jiang Dehai nervously handed over a cup of tea, “Your Majesty, please have some tea to calm down.”
Zhao Qi looked at the few green tea leaves at the bottom of the cup and felt offended—he had been cuckolded by two lovers he hadn’t even met. Honestly, his feelings were complicated. The dog emperor knew he was impotent, yet he kept so many beauties, both male and female, in the palace. Wasn’t he just setting himself up for this?
How could he blame the beauties for their mistakes? It was his own fault for giving them too much freedom.
Zhao Qi sighed inwardly, maintaining his dog emperor persona on the surface. He coldly said, “Where is she? Where is that s/ut?”
“She is currently locked up in the Cold Palace, awaiting Your Majesty’s judgment.”
“Bring me my great sword,” Zhao Qi rolled up his sleeves, “Let’s go!”
Given his dog emperor image, Zhao Qi expected that Miss Wang would break down in tears and beg for forgiveness upon seeing him. Instead, her actions shocked everyone.
Knowing she was doomed, Miss Wang wanted to have a final say before her death. Pointing at Zhao Qi’s nose, she cursed, “You dog emperor! You forcibly took me into the palace and never touched me. Do you expect me to live like a widow for you? You deserve to be cuckolded! That man is a thousand, no, ten thousand times better than you. I am willing to bear his child!”
Zhao Qi: “…”
“Hurry,” Jiang Dehai pointed at Miss Wang, “Hurry and gag her!”
“No need,” Zhao Qi watched coldly, “Let her speak.”
This girl had a spirit and unconventional thinking. It was truly a waste for her to be just a minor character in the book.
Miss Wang broke free from the eunuch’s grasp and said, “Dog emperor, if you want to kill me, then do it. Don’t waste your energy asking who the father of my child is. I won’t tell you even if I die! And I have no regrets; this is my joy as a woman!”
Watching the scene, Jiang Bao’er said, “I’ve never seen someone so shameless. Your Majesty, in my opinion, she should have her entire family executed!”
Miss Wang sneered, “I have been an orphan since childhood. My child and I are my entire family!”
Look at that, such courage in the face of death! Zhao Qi couldn’t help but applaud her in his mind.
“What’s her name?” Zhao Qi asked.
Jiang Dehai answered, “Her name is Wang Xueqin.”
Xueqin? Aunt Xue? The name sounded vaguely familiar… Zhao Qi sensed the author’s twisted sense of humor. “Jiang Dehai, what do you think I should do with her?”
Jiang Dehai bowed and said, “The last person who committed such a crime was directly boiled alive by Your Majesty.”
Miss Wang’s body immediately went limp, and she fell to the ground, unable to kneel properly.
Zhao Qi’s expression changed too. Holding back his disgust, he said, “That’s too simple. It’s too lenient for her.”
“What does Your Majesty mean?”
“Let her stay in the Cold Palace and be responsible for cleaning all the toilets in the harem.” Zhao Qi thought it over and added, “Also, I have a new medicine that I want to test on pregnant women—take her away.”
“Dog emperor!” Miss Wang screamed as she struggled, “You will die a horrible death! I’m not the only one who sought pleasure with someone else!”
Jiang Bao’er quickly declared, “Your Majesty, Bao’er swears by the heavens, Bao’er is devoted to only you!”
Zhao Qi rubbed his temples, “Why are you here?”
“Your Majesty,” Jiang Bao’er looked at him with affectionate eyes, “Bao’er missed you.”
Zhao Qi asked, “Have you finished counting the bricks?”
Jiang Bao’er nodded repeatedly, “There are three hundred twenty-six bricks in the Mingcui Palace, thirty-one of which have tiny cracks.”
“How many beauties are there in my harem?”
“That…” Jiang Bao’er looked to Jiang Dehai for help. Jiang Dehai answered, “Ten women, fifteen men, a total of twenty-five people.”
Zhao Qi was slightly surprised, “So few?”
“Your Majesty, there are still many who haven’t been brought into the palace.”
Deciding what to do with these twenty-five people was a problem. Directly dismissing them would arouse suspicion from Empress Dowager Wen and some treacherous ministers, which would be troublesome. But leaving them unchecked would only increase the number of affairs.
“Old Jiang.”
Jiang Dehai hesitated, “Is Your Majesty calling this servant?”
“Yes, gather those twenty-five people for me to see.”
Soon, the harem of the Dog Emperor was assembled. Zhao Qi held a stick and ordered them to line up from tallest to shortest in five rows. The Dog Emperor’s only merit was his good taste; every one of them was a beauty of different types. Pick any one, and her looks would rival the top stars of the modern entertainment industry. Each also had some talents, making them perfect to form a group and debut.
Zhao Qi had a flash of inspiration. Perhaps these people could truly be put to good use.
“Wait a minute, where is one of them?” Zhao Qi said. “Where is Rong Tang? Why is he missing?”
Jiang Dehai replied, “Your Majesty, Young Master Rong is unwell and unable to come.”
Had the sick beauty’s condition worsened? Zhao Qi stood up. “I’ll go see him on the way.”
Jiang Dehai asked, “Your Majesty, what about these beauties…”
“Oh, right.” Zhao Qi cleared his throat and began his speech. “I promised the Empress Dowager that I would focus on cultivating my mind and body and would not visit the harem often for a while. You all should behave yourself, read more books, and exercise.”
The beauties lowered their heads, exchanging puzzled glances.
Zhao Qi called out, “Jiang Bao’er.”
Jiang Bao’er approached. “Bao’er is here!”
“Take the others and run ten laps around the Imperial Garden. After you finish, you’re free to go.”
Jiang Bao’er thought she heard wrong. “Your Majesty wants us… to run?”
“Health is important. If you all end up like Rong Tang, becoming a medicine jar, and can’t handle a little exertion, what use are you to me?”
After reprimanding the beauties, Zhao Qi went to the Drunken Book Study. The palace maid there told him that Rong Tang was currently resting.
Zhao Qi said, “Understood. You all may leave. Guards, stay at the door. If I call, you must come immediately.” He was quite fearful of Rong Tang, someone with a problematic history.
“Yes.”
As Zhao Qi walked into the room, he smelled a faint medicinal fragrance. There was a screen inside, behind which a beauty was sleeping. Rong Tang lay there with his eyes closed, his long eyelashes dense as feathers, and his face as handsome as a jade crown—like a celestial being fallen to the mortal realm. Unfortunately, the celestial being had been tainted by hatred. On the surface, he seemed as cold as the moon, but internally, he was thinking of a hundred ways to torment the Dog Emperor.
Zhao Qi observed him and thought to himself that he didn’t want to kill Rong Tang, so Rong Tang shouldn’t think about harming him. Let’s reconcile, okay?
Rong Tang, in his sleep, furrowed his brow slightly, then coughed lightly and slowly opened his eyes, seeing Zhao Qi’s enlarged face.
Rong Tang: “…”
Seeing that the beauty didn’t react, Zhao Qi moved his face closer. “You’re awake?”
Rong Tang turned his face away. “Stay away from me.”
Zhao Qi straightened up and sat at the foot of the bed. “How much medicine did you take? You smell entirely of medicine.” And it actually smelled rather nice.
Rong Tang said coldly, “Probably more than the tea Your Majesty drinks.”
“Are you trying to get yourself killed?” Zhao Qi said. “You wanted to perish together with me, but I’m fine, and you ended up as a sickly mess.”
Rong Tang nodded slightly. “Indeed, I was too slow.”
Zhao Qi recalled the scene and said, “You didn’t just act slowly; you acted with your mouth.” Luckily, he dodged in time, or he would have lost both his life and his first kiss.
Rong Tang smiled slightly. “I hope Your Majesty will not be influenced by this incident when dealing with others.”
If Rong Tang hadn’t mentioned it, Zhao Qi wouldn’t have thought much of it. But now that he had, Zhao Qi might just imagine the word “poison” whenever he tried to kiss someone in the future.
This trick is deadly.
Zhao Qi was somewhat annoyed and retorted, “Why would I use my mouth on others? I only use it on you. Have you forgotten what you are to me?”
Rong Tang’s already pale face grew even whiter.
Zhao Qi was amused. Knowing Rong Tang’s feelings for him were rapidly declining, he continued to taunt, “You don’t have any poison on you now, right? So let’s finish what we didn’t complete last time.” As he spoke, he moved closer to the head of the bed, getting even nearer to Rong Tang.
Rong Tang calmly looked at him and suddenly smiled. “Actually, if you take a closer look, Your Majesty, you are quite a handsome man yourself.”
Zhao Qi was taken aback and suspiciously asked, “What are you up to?”
Rong Tang slowly said, “Since I am already imprisoned in the harem, there’s no avoiding what’s coming. If Your Majesty wants me to attend to you, then I shall do so.”
Zhao Qi’s eyes widened. Wait… Why are you not sticking to the script?! Hey, your character is falling apart!
No, the current situation isn’t drastically different from the original plot. Rong Tang shouldn’t suddenly break character. Something’s definitely wrong!
Realizing this, Zhao Qi tried to leave, but Rong Tang grabbed him and pulled him back, causing him to fall onto the soft bed. Then, a cold, medicinal-smelling body pressed down on him.
Rong Tang, with a surprising strength, held Zhao Qi’s wrists above his head with one hand and covered his mouth with the other, preventing him from calling out. Zhao Qi was immobilized, staring at him with wide eyes.
The intense struggle made Rong Tang cough again. “Cough, cough, Your Majesty…”
“Mmm—”
“Zhao Qi,” Rong Tang whispered in his ear, “Tell me, how many people have you slept with?”
Due to the lack of oxygen, Zhao Qi’s face turned crimson. He shook his head, indicating his innocence. It wasn’t just him; even the Dog Emperor’s original body couldn’t have managed to sleep with many people!
“You’re so dirty; it makes me feel nauseous for you.”
“Mmm, mmm…”
Zhao Qi struggled desperately, but Rong Tang used the last of his strength to pin him down, a thin layer of sweat forming on his forehead. “How about we cut off the dirtiest part of you? Cough, cough, it could be a way to cleanse Your Majesty.”
No way! That’s the ‘dragon’ I’ve worked so hard to recover! Someone, hurry! My dragon eggs 1I think the author means ‘ball sacks’… har har are going to be squeezed to death!
With a loud bang, the door was pushed open from the outside. A man in dark clothes strode in and, upon seeing the two entangled on the bed, raised an eyebrow and said, “Hmm? It seems I’ve come at an inconvenient time.”
T/N: Yay! A new novel?! If you’re wondering if it’s a good idea to take on 4 novels at the same time; my answer – “Probably not…”
But after reading a few chapters of this, I just HAD to snatch this project up. I haven’t done transmigration with a true-doomed villain start so I want to try this one! ANYWAY, there is plenty more where that came from, so stay tuned! And stay healthy! Straighten your posture, so some stretches and drink some water before continuing hehe~
If you like my translations, feel free to donate to my ko-fi!
I really, really appreciate all the support from my readers <3 It goes a long way and motivates me lots!
Also, check out the other series we have on HoH!
If you like cats, check out Revenge of the Garfield
If you like dragons, check out I’m Pregnant with the Hope of the Entire Planet and The Dragon and the ‘Princess’
How about some mystery or showbiz? Check out Morbid Addiction & Perfection
What about the perfect, most non-toxic male lead ever? Laws of Love
How about MC nursing ML back to health? Forced into the Deep
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